Oh, right. That’s why.

998 goals. That’s how many goals Brazilian soccer player Romario says he has scored. Pretty impressive tally, but wait, seems that all 998 were not scored as a professional or in international play, and seems to have been kept track of by a stalker… or more probably Romario himself.

The Brazilian media have long questioned Romario’s total, which is published on Vasco’s official Web site. The tally includes 77 goals scored at youth level and numerous others from testimonial games and club friendlies.

Okay, well if you are going to count youth league and games in the park, I bet there is some guy in Jersey who has like 4,000 goals and counting, but we don’t count youth league stats in the real world… only the completely self obsessed do that. This can’t be more clear than from an entry from a diary which was stolen from Romario in 2004:

Dear Diary, I am so awesome. I scored 18 goals in five minutes against a bunch of handicapped children yesterday.. I am best footballer alive. I will have 1,000 goals in no time at all, and then I will be the most fantastic player ever.

Fascinating stuff…but if any other pro out there actually keeps track of their lifetime totals including kid leagues, I would have to assume its Barry Bonds… he seems like the kind of guy who would know such a stat.

• Romario says his 998 goals include unofficial games (Reuters)