John Rocker is the latest name to pop up on the list of steroid/ HGH customers of Signature Pharmacy, but of course he was only taking it for medical reasons…that’s cute. It would be just a bit too convenient if none of these athletes are guilty, and those whose names didn’t mysteriously appear on the list, were all taking prescribed banned substances for medical reasons. I’m sorry if I don’t believe that nearly 20 athletes all just happen to have the same pharmacy in Mobile, Alabama… especially Gary Matthews, Jr. who grew up in San Francisco and according to a report, just happened to have received a shipment in 2004, pretty much when his numbers started improving drastically… something that typically happens at 25 or 26, not 30 or 31.

If I may use the word again, its all just a little too convenient. Now, finally at the urging of his owner who is not very amused with this whole mess, and after having one member of the boy band known as the OJ dream team make a statement on his behalf, Matthews, Jr. finally spoke:

“I’ve got my representatives looking for more information on it,” he said. “But I can’t comment on it. I will address it at the appropriate time.”

Appropriate time… is that a joke? If now’s not good for you, how about next week? No, next month? Come one guy, this is not going away, you are not Barry Bonds, and if anything, because no one has been able to completely destroy Barry Bonds, you may have to go down in his stead. I don’t know why people have not learned more from Jason Giambi. There we have a guy, who took steroids, but on a day-to-day basis that is not what people talk about… never underestimate the power of a tearful apology. Denials and cop-outs only fan the flame. As I hinted a few days ago, Gary could really be doing almost anything else than the cop-outs and legal-speak. A nice press conference in the buff talking only about unicorns and your utter contempt for Tim Hardaway would probably do an excellent job at re-focusing the negative attention.

I mean really Gary, unless you are being casted for the next VH1 Surreal Life, its never good to be on a list with Jose Canseco, John Rocker, and a bodybuilding champ, and no one is stupid enough not to figure that out for you while you hide and hope this all goes away. Tearful apology dude, I’m telling you, get’s ‘em every time.

• Report: Rocker admits taking HGH, but for medical reasons (AP)
• Holyfield denies steroid allegations (Bloomberg)
• Moreno may be first owner to understand steroids mess (AP)