Definitely not appear in a buddy film with Carrot Top, and that looks like where A-Rod is headed. With spring training only a week away, we haven’t had a good chance to boo A-Rod in quite some time, so it is without hesitation that I share this little nugget of information: A-Rod was the only celebrity attendee at Pauly Shore’s birthday party last Wednesday.

Now, its sad that A-Rod’s only friend seems to be Pauly Shore, I feel for him, really I do. I guess when you get booed as much as A-Rod does, its nice to be in the company of someone who’s work product is of a much lower standard than yours. It would be like hanging out with a crackhead… it would make me look great in comparison because I’m not jittery or an emotional roller coaster, I shower regularly, and I don’t pleasure strangers for a fix. Yep, I’d look pretty suave if I was hanging out with Tyrone Biggums.

But I think more than that is, how many of you, after reading that A-Rod was the only celebrity at the party, actually dropped Alex down a notch or two in their minds? No one did. Of course not, because for most people he is already there, in the gutter, waiting to get kicked in the head with an iron boot.

On to a completely unrelated subject: anyone out there have an iron boot I could borrow?